On one occasion I had a bracket for a hydraulic ram blow apart on a stubborn slide. When it broke it sounded like a shotgun going off. The subsequent chain of expletives that I rattled off was even louder. Neither was to go unnoticed in the Methodist campground where it occurred. A small crowd of the camp’s elders assembled as I assessed the damage. In a hasty fit I pulled a welder, two grinders, a torch, and a bunch of steel out of my storage. To their amazement I proceeded to fabricate a new and improved bracket on a nearby picnic table turned metal shop. I installed it, put all my shit away and got the slide retracted. My proud moment was quickly silenced by simple sensibility. One of the camp’s elders remarked that perhaps if I didn’t have all of that heavy equipment in my camper then maybe the slide outs wouldn’t get stuck. I tend to operate more along the lines of bringing a raincoat on a sunny day’s float to keep it from raining. This philosophy has saved me many times, but it is by no means lightweight.
The run up north entails the practice of pulling a 22,000 pound fifth wheel with a drift boat trailer hanging off of a stinger hitch behind it. While legally tolerated during my travels out west, no eastern seaboard state permits it. The run north to central Pennsylvania and later on to the banks of the Upper Delaware always includes the threat of tangles with the law. Certain reroutes are necessary to avoid major highways. Any travel through Virginia is asking for trouble. A long and indirect route over secondary roads further complicates the trip. Other concerns include the inability to back up, make U-turns, or utilize anything short of a truck stop to get fuel. Couple all of that with a general fear of passing the law, and you have the makings of my twice yearly eastern migrations.
I am always envious of my dog’s oblivious state at this time. He is simply excited to be going somewhere, somehow. Any and all of the potential meltdown possibilities associated with dragging the circus train 800 miles never occur in his mind. Having already encountered many of the eventualities of this type of travel rewards me very little comfort. I say my goodbyes and pack it all up in hopes that my travels will be uneventful. And, in most cases, it all goes off without much more than a few hiccups.